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First off, I am not a neuroscietist, a psychologist, or any thing remotely like that. Just the average guy, so take what I say with about a pound of salt.
First, its not you fault. With what knowledge I do have, I can tell you that something somewhere isn't what it is supposed to be, and you are having to deal with the consequences. Whether psychological or genetic is up for those 6-7 figure income guys in the lab coats to decide.
Next, Ill say something my psychology teacher once told my class. Essentially, you are your brain. Everything perceived, felt, seen, remember, thought, all of it centers around your brain. So if your brain is telling you that men look much more appetizing then women, and you feel that you could rock the dress your BFF is wearing much better than she can (FYI, i generalizing to be funny, hope your cracking a smile, cause if not, I'm drowning here), then who can tell you different.
However, while I know that statistics say that as much as 90% of men who have sex change operations and the like are relatively happy with them, I personally ( a happily straight male, so my opinion only means so much) think you can't really change that way. I know the idea is to change the outside to match the inside, but it seems like just as much of a lie to me as the pretending to be a guy, when your mind is telling you you are a girl. You are who you are, at least in some respects, and no amount of body butchering can change that.
You can however, own who you are, be the unique individual you are, seek those who WILL accept you, and know at least one person (yours truly) could care less if he saw you walking down the street, holding another mans hand, wearing custom made high heels, and rocking a cyan colored sundress, complete with matching bag and wide brimmed hat to keep the sun out of your eyes (again, trying to lighten it up, if you prefer your sundresses in yellow, I completely understand).
All seriousness here though, find people who make you happy. Find those things that make you happy. Screw the rest of the world. IF surgery helps that, go for it. If you just want to wear what you want, and like who you want, that is fine too.
Just put as much effort as you can into NOT dying, before you decide to put that much effort into not living.
Don't break my heart on this one, okay? Good Luck, stay strong.
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- Asker's Comment:
- It's hard for me sometimes. A lot of straight guys at my school are attracted to me, but have to remind themselves that I'm not anatomically like females. I just resemble one. Your answer definitely spoke to me. Thank you so much for your support and help on this situation. It means a lot